busy
by nevergoback
Summary: post-fic for 7x10 "Bad Santa".


He felt like he failed her.

Sure, he loved working with the team. He loved every inches of it, loved how it made him felt like he was useful. Loved the fact that he got a full packet here, the brothers he never had…and a wife. He loved the excitement, the theory-building, kisses he stole from her when it's break time.

But what disturbed him the most, he was scared. He was so, so scared. Because it wasn't even two months yet since he married her, and he was already letting her down.

"Oh come on, Rick. We're married." She said it in the middle of the christmas-themed movie, out of the blue. It was a Castle-family-tradition that wasn't really a tradition anymore, since Alexis and Martha left right after dinner.

"I know. I'm so thankful that you said yes." He said in matter of fact, clearly knew it wasn't the respond she wanted to have when he saw her rolling her eyes.

Kate grabbed the remote control on his hand, clicking pause. "We're married, and you're still keeping secrets? That's so three years ago."

"Kate-"

"Is it my poem? Is it something that I do? Please tell me what's wrong, Castle. So I…So we can fix it." Her words were honest, and she looked so worried that it started to scare him. She thought it was her fault?

"Oh, Kate," He covered her cheeks with his hands. They were cold. "No. No. You've done nothing wrong. And your poem is perfect, Kate…" He suddenly felt very overwhelmed, because she was so perfect to him and he had to let her down. "You're perfect."

She replied with a small smile. "Then tell me what's wrong. It's Christmas and you look so sad."

"Okay," he sighed, taking her hands into his. "Okay. I can't fulfill my vow."

Five words, and then he saw the very moment her face became pale, her mouth gaped and closed in surprise. A few seconds later, when she looked like she had her voice back, she stood up. He thought she was going to yell at him, but what came was just a heartbreaking whisper.

"What?"

"Kate, it's not like what you think."

"Are you asking for a divorce in a Christmas day of all days?" Tears were threatened to fall from her eyes and he couldn't feel anymore stupid. He was a writer for God's sake, and he couldn't pick the right words?

"No, no, Kate. Not like that. I love you. I just..."

But she was leaving, and he grabbed her shoulder as she threw a weak punch to his chest. When she finally slower her walk, he let go of her shoulder, trying to find the right words.

"Kate, I will never ever do that to the most precious woman in my life. You know that."

That stopped her for a while.

"What I'm trying to say is, I'm no longer permitted to work with the NYPD. Gates told me that." He continued. He waited for her reaction, but she just wouldn't turn her back to him.

"What about...what about what you said about the vow?" He could imagine her breathing eased just a little.

"Well, I vowed that I will become your partner in crime and life, 'til death do us part, and for the times of our lives. And now I can't be your partner in crime. I'm so sorry, Kate."

He was so relieved that at least, at least, he could arrange the right words. "Now would you please turn around and hug me? You and I need that."

In no time, she was running back in his strong arms. "Never ever think that I'd leave you, Kate. You're too precious."

He tightened her body to him if it was possible. "I love you."

It was quiet for a while but then she finally spoke. "Good."

"Good?"

She nodded into his chest. "Yeah. You know, despite your poor word-choices...the situation we have right now kinda fits."

"What kinda fits?"

"You. Telling me you can't be in the precinct anymore. Saying you love me."

He frowned. "I still don't get it."

She laughed, and he couldn't help but steal a kiss from her pink lips. "Now I know for sure that you will still love me, even though we're not gonna work on cases anymore and you'll so busy."

He let go of her just to look at her in the eye. "Busy?"

"Yeah. Writing novels, loving me, missing me from home, dreaming about me…" She gave him the brightest smile, and she was so beautiful that it made him so dizzy, wanting to pass out. "…and taking care of a baby? I can't imagine that, Castle. You will be so tired."

"Kate? Are – are you…?"

"Yes, Daddy. I most definitely am." She gave him a quick kiss.

He might really pass out.


End file.
